Home -> Summer 1998 -> Helping America's Criminals

Get 'Em Off The Street

A big reason for crime is that breaking the law is the only way most criminals know how to make money. Part of the problem with our criminal justice system is that it is more punitive than rehabilitative. We focus on punishment, not retraining for a useful place in society.

I think we can change that with volunteer efforts. I think we can show criminals the benefit of good, steady, legal work. I propose

Take A Pimp To Work Day

That's right, Take A Pimp To Work Day. Let's face it, if you care enough to take your daughter to work, then she already knows that you love her, and she already knows that a job helps you provide for her. A pimp doesn't know any of that. All a pimp knows is pimping. We have to change that.

We also have to change society's attitudes about pimps. Let's face it, would you hire a pimp to work for you? Of course not. You are biased against these people. But they have useful skills and they can be put to work for you. Let's take a look.

Pimping SkillPossible Job
Maintaining a stylish wardrobe and a "phat ride". Car/Clothes Salesman
Convincing People to Violate their personal code of morals for money. Political Lobbyist
Taking a sizable portion of a hard-working person's income whom they have not helped in any meaningful way. IRS Auditor
Lying to Police and other investigators when caught beating women, sleeping with underage girls, and hanging around with drug users. NFL Spin Doctor

The list goes on and on. So, please, help me start Take A Pimp To Work Day. Together, we can get these desperate people off the street, and into the office.

They need your help.

Last Updated: 21 June 1998
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