Sirius and Lupin are on the Motorcycle. Sirius: Damn. Lupin: I told you to go before we left. Sirius: It's not -that-! It's just... *The Motorcycle splutters and then dies* Lupin: I told you to check -that- too. Well, let's land. Sirius: What the hell is this place? >Potions I Class >(OOC Date: Feb. 18, 2002) >Back to Logs Sirius: Nooo! Nooo! I don't want to go to one of Snape's classes! Lupin: Don't worry. I don't think.. Snape: *appears* Lupin: You just -had- to mention him, didn't you. You know what I told you about Mentionitis. Sirius: Oh hell. >Practical Magics - Potions Classroom Sirius: I don't remember a potions classroom in that movie. Snape: ... >James Crowley walks into the class in his usual "floating" motion Lupin: He's a ghost? Sirius: He's a pouf. Snape: Who is this bozo in my classroom? >carrying a box full of little baggies with the various ingredients >inside. Humming soundlessly, he places a baggy on very desk waiting for >the arrival of his students. He looked calm, as usual, and hoped his Sirius: Aaah! I've gone deaf! Lupin: No, he's just humming soundlessly. Snape: -His- students?! Have I been promoted? Sirius: *muttering* Not bloody likely. >students would have fun making the cheering potion. What am I thinking, >he wonders, of course they will. .it's the /cheering/ potion. Snape: Dumbledore's really scraped the bottom this time. This one's worse than -you-, Lupin. Lupin: Now, I don't know about that. I mean, he does seem to be telepathic. Even Moody only had X-ray vision. Sirius: I expect you've been sacked, Snape. >No longer all enthusiastic like she usually is - apparently her >punishment yesterday had had a major affect on her general optimism - >Katya Davidovna trots in seconds before the bell rings. Sulking, the girl >shoves her things onto a couner beside her friend and instantly starts in >to a furious, lengthy rant, "Ohmy/god/ Lisa, you wouldn't -believe- Lupin: Sulk - To be silently sullen. Sirius: You always know the answer, Remus. Look, Snape's demonstrating. Snape: What have I done to be stuck here with you two fools? >Professor Macphersons! He is like the most unfair teacher in the world?! >Yesterday, me and Luke walk into the Defense Against the Dark Arts >classroom, right, and two seconds later /boom/, we're both in hot water >because he can't take a joke." Lupin: Luke and I... Sirius: *gleeful* Sacked, sacked, sacked. Snape: *looks shocked* Lupin: At least it took more than one person to replace you, Severus. Sirius: sackedsackedsacked Snape: *draws his wand* Lupin: Sirius, shove it. >Luke Cordner struts into class, but not as strong as he usually does. He Sirius: You're no fun, Remus. What's up with this git. Is he a giant chicken? >squints in the low lighted room and takes a seat closest to a source of >light. Potions was at least one of the classes he wasn't failing /badly/ >in. Snape: *darkly* -Was- indeed... Lupin: This is very odd. >Stormie Quinn toddles in with a yawn, taking her usual seat in the middle Sirius: It's a bloody nursery school. Snape: Hogwarts does not allow toddlers. The droolers are -quite- enough. >row of counters. She grins at the professor, now quite interested in his >characteristics and family background she had discovered earlier that >day. It was quite interesting, having a teacher who wasn't completely >human. Lupin: ... Sirius: Rrowl. Hey, Lupin, you didn't by any chance let any of your students 'discover' anything about you, did you? Snape: I'm going to be ill. Lupin: *pulls out his wand* Sirius: *hastily* Er, no, no, of course I didn't mean that. Um, Remus? No.. ow! >Zinnia Zeroth walks into the the classroom cautiously and slowly. She >makes her way to a seat towards the back of the room, setting her >supplies beside her and turning towards the teacher. Snape: I'm -really- going to be ill. Lupin: And don't you do that again. >Addison Williamson marches into the classroom and seats himself at the >front of the classroom. With a scowl he examines everyone else in the >room. This would definitely give him some ground to criticize people. Sirius: Because his head turns around a full 180 degrees. Lupin: Maybe he has X-ray vision too. >Interacting with everyone always made their errors visible. With a sly >grin, he watches Professor Crowley intently. Chuckling, he drums his >fingers on the desk, this indeed was going to be an interesting class. Snape: So what happened to it? Lupin: It's always a shame when things don't turn out as expected. Sirius: Interesting hell. This is boring! What's say we nip behind that desk over there for a quick shag, Remus? Lupin: Sirius! Snape: Ew! >The sun rose in the east; it's a day that ends in 'y' - indeed, all is >right in the world of Kyrie Watts, and it shows. The sixth grade girl >strides into the potions classroom, arms swinging at her sides and a >slight bounce lightening her steps. A cheery, potentially obnoxiously so, Snape: Potentially?! Lupin: Sirius, I mean it-- stop that. Sirius: You know you want to. Lupin: But.. Snape: Gah! Just get away from me! >grin is offered to all who happen to catch her eye as she makes her way >towards a vacant counter and stool, bag set on the floor rather absently. >The hooded figure of a child wearing the green robes of a Scattergood >student slinks into the potions classroom. At the figure's heals, a Snape: Scatterwhat? Lupin: *muffled* Did you say something, Severus? Sirius: He's just trying to distract us, Remus. Can't stand to see people having a good time. Snape: Put your clothes back on, you git! Lupin: I don't think he's going to go away, Sirius. Sirius: Dammit! I had more privacy in bloody Azkaban. What are you on about now, Snape? Snape: I'll show you what I'm on about! Lupin: Expelliarmus! >miniature gryffin follows loyally. The figure reaches up to slide back >its hood, revealing the face of Giltwist Myrric. The solitary boy makes Sirius: What the hell is that?! Lupin: Umm.. Snape: *sulking* I told you... Lupin: I don't think we're in England anymore, Sirius. Sirius: This is your fault, Snape! >his way to the back of the room and takes a seat well away from the other >students. Unfortunately, for his gryffin, the stool does not inspire a >lap upon which it could curl up. Lupin: I should hope not! Griffins are huge! Snape: What?! You're the one who dragged me here with your stupid Mentionitis! Lupin: He's right, you know. Sirius: Oh hell. >"And /then/ (you wouldn't believe this) Professor Lehr is making me do >work! The MUGGLE way! How unfair is that? I swear she has like a >deathwish for me, because that's just plain pointless and - ow, get off >of me you stupid griffin." Glare is given to her gray and brown cat who, Snape: Even -Hagrid- knows a griffin is not a CAT. Lupin: I wonder what she'd do if he sat on her. Sirius: What would you do if I sat on you? Lupin: But I'm not sitting. Sirius: That could be changed. Snape: Hello! Still in the room! >heedless to her words, awkwardly seats himself on Katya Davidovna's lap >and proceeds to kneed with his claws. Grump. Snape: It has claws on its knees? Lupin: That's some cat. Maybe Hagrid -was- involved. Padfoot: *grrr* >James Crowley walks in his calm floating way, like a cloud, to the front >of the class room. Raising a hand towards Katya he replies softly, "Miss >Davidovna, I would like to begin class, if that is okay with you." Not Lupin: Like a cloud. Like a windblown mass of water vapor. Snape: Ah, so the classroom is foggy. Maybe we are in England after all. Padfoot: *grrr* Lupin: You can't sit in my non-existant lap as a dog either, Sirius. >waiting for an answer he begins anyway, "Today, class, we will discuss >and create, cheering potions. You will be working in groups of 2. As soon Sirius: Otherwise known as.. pairs! Lupin: Maybe pears, the way this thing is going. Snape: Why would anyone waste their valuable time on something like this? The Charm is far more effective and takes less time to prepare. >as I finish talking I would like you to find a partner before I will >discuss the uses of such a potion. Now." His voice turns calm but >incredibly serious, "After you learn this potion today, if I catch any of >you using it for recreation purposes, I will report you to the >Headmistress." The seriousness leaves his voice, "Now, find yourself a >partner!" Snape: I bet she has a whip. Sirius: *backs away from Snape* Lupin: I wonder what kind of 'recreation purposes' this potion has. What are they making, Severus? Snape: Playdoh. Sirius: Yum! >A girl walks into the room. Who could this girl be? Well none other but >Ruthie Reinken? Class suck-up, straight A student. Does anyone not love >her? Lupin: *raises his hand* Snape: *raises his hand* Sirius: *raises his hand* >Luke Cordner looks around for a partner. His eye falls on Stormie and he >grins, "Stomie! Be my partner, pwease?" Sirius: They really shouldn't let pre-schoolers play with potions. Lupin: Severus said they were making playdoh. Sirius: Oh, I guess that's all right then. >Zinnia Zeroth glances hopelessly around the room, looking at all of the >unfamiliar faces. Who out of all of these strangers would want to be her >partner? She sighs, heads a sheet of parchment for Potions, Cheering >Potion, and looks back around the room in search of a partner. Snape: What a winner. Where are those stupid Gryffindo-gooders when you need them? Sirius: Are you insulting my godson, Snape? Snape: Yes. Sirius: Just checking. Lupin: Leave my pants alone, Sirius. >Ruthie needs a partner! Yes she does! She's the smartest in the class, >probably the prettiest, well she thinks so. And she always gets what she >wants. If you want an A, partner with her. It'd be a good choice. Legolas: I'M the prettiest! Snape: Wrong series! Sirius: He is pretty. Lupin: *gets out his wand* Sirius: OW! >Addison Williamson gives Ruthie a glare. This isn't your usual Addison >run-of-the-mill glare, no, this is the glare of a boy who is staring at >his hated enemy. With a shudder he reminisces the teacher treatment. Even >thinking about it made him sick. At the Professor's instructions, he Snape: Someone better call the janitor then. Lupin: I wonder what kind of cheering charm you could make with /that/. Lupin: Sirius! Sirius: I'm -bored-. >merely scrunches his nose. He better not be partnered with Ruthie. That >girl...the boy shudders again. "Cheering potions?" he mutters the words, >and then narrows his eyes at the Professor. Snape: You fool. He wouldn't trick you with the -title- of the assignment. >Stormie Quinn blinks at Luke and nods, "Ok, I'll be your partner." She >gets from her seat and stis herself next to Luke, setting her things down Snape: Gets what? What the heck is stis? Is that like stabs? >on the counter quietly. "I hope you don't think I'm as good at potions as >I am with history, because I'm not." >Kyrie Watts purses her lips faintly, surveying the room. Well, the girl >notes to herself, this is a problem. Dunno'er. Dunno'm. That one already >has a partner. Dunno'm. That one hates her. Dunno'm. Dunno'er. A pause, >and then Ky just shrugs it right off, pulls a 180 in her seat and faces >the girl behind her, head canting to the left unconsciously. "Hiya. Wanna >partner?" The slightly over-active brunette might have no idea who that >girl, Zinnia, is, but really, doesnt matter much to her. Snape: What is with these people? I hardly liked to acknowledge your existance, but I knew-- Snape: My eyes, my eyes! Lupin: *whispers* He's looking again, Sirius. Sirius: Too late to stop now! >Maybe if he waits long enough, Giltwist Myrric will be the odd man out. Snape: *loudly* He's not the only one out. Sirius: Are you implying something? Snape: No, I'm saying it. >That would really be for the best. He casually reaches into his satchel >for the potions textbook. Trying to avoid notice, he buries his nose into >the book. Lupin: I would think a book hanging off your face would make you more noticeable. Snape: Like say, no clothing? Lupin: *blushes* >Ruthie just sits at her desk, "Who's going to partner with me? I know you >all want to." She does her littler perky smile hugging up against her Snape: Oh god, let me kill her now. Sirius: Be my guest. Snape: *gleeful* Lupin: Expelliarmus! Snape: With my bare hands! >smiley faced pillow. Being a suckup helps, Andrea made a magical pillow >out of her favorite smiley pillow. Lupin: Right. I withdraw my objections. >Zinnia Zeroth looks at Kyrie, rather surprised, but happy that someone >asked. She shrugs, then smiles and says "Sure." She hopes this will be >an opportunity to make a friend, so that next time she won't just be an >unknown. And the girl looks nice enough, so why not? she asks herself. Sirius: These people are pathetic. No friends? Even Snape had a friend. Snape: I resent that implication! Lupin: Sirius, apologize to Severus. >James Crowley looks around the room to see that Mr. Myrric doesn't have a >partner and neither does, Mr. Williamson or Miss Ruthie, "Mr. Myrric >shall be with the couple of Mr. Williamson and Miss Ruthie" He smiles and >chuckles, "But not couples for the dance or anything." He turns serious Snape: Let me kill that one too. Sirius: I'll support that idea. Lupin: Oh my god. >once again, "What practical uses can one use the cheering potion for?" He >scans the room looking for who doesn't want to answer the question the >most. Lupin: Because of course you can tell that just by looking. Snape: Probably. These students are too stupid to pretend otherwise. >Ruthie looks excited. "Oh, two people want to be with me. Of course!" He >smiles a little looking down at her pillow. If anyone is mean to her >it'll fly at them. "So, cheering potion? But I'm already all cheery!" Sirius: Snape, I think I caught your illness. Snape: Impossible, as it was you making me ill. Sirius: This girl... let me just say, the Dementors were less frightening. Lupin: Let me distract you again, Padfoot. >Luke Cordner looks like he doesn't get it. But what else is new? He goes >to making a face out of the ingredients on the table (TM: Stormie). Snape: Trademark? Sirius: They've all lost it. I don't think I can even be distracted right now, Remus. It's all too disturbing. Lupin: I'll -bet- he does't get it. >Addison Williamson looks away from Ruthie in hopes that she won't notice >him. She was a ridiculous girl...that was for certain. Shuddering yet Lupin: *perks up* Was? Sirius: Did you get her, Snape? Snape: Wasn't me. Maybe she choked on that pillow. >again, he hopes that he gets to be on his own for this one. 'A' student >or not, there was no way his patience could handle the perkiness. With an >exasperated look he frowns at James, he didn't want to tolerate her. Of >all the people he had to get stuck with! That suck up, and the freak. Sirius: Oh ho ho.. James. Lupin: One of the students who was 'discovering' things about the teachers? Snape: That explains it all. It's a porno scene. Those are never written well. Lupin: And you would know this... how? Severus? >Great. And above all things they were creating a cheering potion. With a >glare he shifts his eyes at the girl, "Fine..." He could have done this >all on his own if he wanted to. After all, he did get 107% in history. Sirius: It's tattooed on his forehead for all the world to see. >Then he mutters at the Professor's question, "Cheering potions can be >used to taint reality and give us the illusion that the world is a happy >place...but one day...that illusion will fail, and we will >be...regrettably depressed, beyond any potion's help." Sirius: Too late. Lupin: Waaay too late. Snape: Just kill yourself and save us more pain. >Ruthie looks at Addison. "Don't be so negative, it isn't good for your >health. You know I heard that like aroma therapy can get you happy again >from your slump. Why don't you try it?" He smiles at the boy, and again Snape: ... Sirius: He? Lupin: This could be interesting after all. >daydreams. This time she sees two giant eyes. What the? Oh, it's Ms. >Narayanan! Sirius: I'm confused. Is there such a thing as a man animagus? Lupin: That's an idea. Snape: ... >Giltwist Myrric has nothing against working in silence and maintains his >buttoned lip. He retrieves his manual from his satchel as well as pen and Lupin: I wonder if it hurt to put the button in. >a notepad. All of these are placed upon the work table, and Giltwist >turns to face the professor for direction. Snape: Stand up. Go out the door. Never come back. >Did James Crowley hear right? Was there a student being rude and talking >back? James's normal watery grey eyes suddenly sharpen like ice as he Sirius: Ice is sharp? Lupin: On this planet, apparently. Sirius: I thought ice was cold. Lupin: That's the way it is where we live, Padfoot. >replies, just as calmly even more so, "Mr. Williamson, same your opinions >for a muggle debate class. If you are rude to me again, I will report you >to your advisor." He didn't care if the boy spoke back to that. If Mr. Snape: What an ass. Give the boy a detention, woman. Lupin: If he didn't care, why is he making a fuss? >Williamson did, he would tell Jack about Addison's behavior. He turns Sirius: -Jack-. >back to Miss Watts, "That is correct, Miss Watts. The cheering potion is >most often used in psychological hospitals. It's more affective then Lupin: Is it now. And what affect does it effect? >other muggle medicine." He changes topics, "Now, before I tell you to go Sirius: Oh, so this is a -muggle- Cheering Potion then. Snape: This is a farce. >ahead and begin your potion, this is what I would like you to do. After >you are done mixing the potion, I would like you all to test it on >yourselves. I only want you to take a small sip. If you take in more, I >will have to peel you off the walls. This is not fun for me." He >indicates a potion on his table that looks to be black, "I am prepared. >If there is some student who disobeys my instructions, I will counter it >with the sadness potion and write a letter to your advisor. Don't try to >fake it because I will know if it worked on you because your nose will be >bright red." He thinks for a moment, "The instructions are on page 33 in >your book. Good Luck!" Lupin: ... Sirius: They're making alcohol! Snape: He's trying to get them all drunk? Lupin: I suppose that's coffee he has on the desk. Sirius: It would make me sad to drink his coffee. Sirius: You've never faked it, have you, Remus? Lupin: Of course not, Sirius. Snape: Hello! Still in the room! >Luke Cordner takes out his book and turns to page 33. "Okay..." He >squints looking down at the pages, "Celadine, Wormwood, orris, catnip." >He laughs, "Wormwood. That sounds silly." Lupin: No sillier than catnip. Sirius: *growls* It doesn't sound silly, it sounds like Wormtail. Snape: Why the hell is he squinting? Get some glasses. >Ruthie just daydreams about various things. Mainly school, she dreams >about Eric. Another eric this time, an Eric Ardolino. Oh would she die >for him to ask her out... ;) Lupin: Apparently American wizards daydream in emoticons. Snape: It's certainly not English. Sirius: Didn't we kill this one already? >Addison Williamson gives Ruthie a cold glare. "Do you not speak English? >I requested silence! It would be respectful of you to comply!" He scoffs Lupin: More telepaths! >and clears his throat, "Aroma therapy? Don't make me laugh...not in a >million years would I attempt something so trite. It won't change the >world. Nothing will change the world." The boy impatiently drums his >fingers on the table. He didn't /want/ to be here, not with these silly >people. They were all so absurd. Well, he'd let them have their toys, >their songs, and their stupid little dreams. This wouldn't change >anything. No matter how hard they tried, it would change nothing, and all >of their efforts would be fruitlessly in vain. He /didn't/ care if the >Professor spoke to his advisor. He challenges the Professor again, "Do >what you see necessary." That said he tilts his head the the right and >continues with his sarcastic remarks. Lupin: ... and a time traveller to boot. Quite impressive. Snape: I haven't seen any sarcastic remarks. I've seen angsty teenage thoughts. Lupin: They can read each others' minds, Severus. Snape: Indeed. I'll grant him the remarks then. I'm still waiting on the sarcasm. >Zinnia Zeroth glances at Kyrie. "Okay... Are you going to move back here >or should I move up there, or do you want to work from where we are?" she >inquires in a run-on sentence, sort of. She feels stupid Sirius: As well she should! >the way she worded it, but she just awaits the reply from Kyrie. >Kyrie Watts answered accurately? Well that's that with the book learning >then. The girl grabs her bag from the floor and hops from her seat, >relocating to Zinnia's counter and plopping herself down unceremoniously. >"I'll move. So, I'm Kyrie. Hi." Her textbook is retrieved from the >treacherously cluttered depths of her bookbag, and flipped open on the >countertop. "Catnip, huh? Crazy. Think he'd have to literally peel us >from the walls?" On she chatters, more to herself than Zinnia after a few >sentences, all the while deftly beginning to arrange the ingredients >neatly. Lupin: Down, Padfoot! Sirius: But.. but they're -cats-!! How did I not notice before? Lupin: Severus, help me hold him down! Snape: Oh no, you're not going to fool me into joining one of your perverted litle games. >Zinnia Zeroth nods. "Hi, I'm Zinnia." She doesn't say much more, just >nodding at Kyrie's conversation, not leaving her much room to respond. Snape: All that nodding must be hard to keep up with. >She checks over the ingredients and helps Kyrie to arrange them, looking >back and forth from them to her book and to Kyrie. Snape: Would you two just get a room! >Stormie Quinn winces at Luke's laughter but follows sweet. "Careful now, >don't put too much catnip in, in this passage it says too much catnip can >cause a high..." Snape: There's a chocolate frog loose in the classroom. Lupin: *breathless* Chocolate? Sirius: Hey! >James Crowley wanders around the classroom watching as people mix >together their potions, "Very good, Miss Watts, Miss Zeroth. Mr. Cordner >and Miss Quinn you better get going." He raises his voice for the whole >class to Snape: How about me? Can I get going? Sirius: *rowls* I'm going. Lupin: Severus, what was th--Sirius! >hear, "Do not put too much catnip in...it should only be a speck. >Otherwise it will make your vision and thoughts cloudy. Also if you put Snape: Too late. Didn't you see that boy squinting before, you fool? >too much Celandine in, it will become a laughing potion. You will >probably laugh yourself sick or until you can't breathe." He grins >slightly, "Or perhaps both. Keep in mind the potion should looks like a >giggly pink." He chuckles. "No pun intended." Snape: I'm definitely going to be sick. Lupin: What's a giggly pink? Sirius: *tickles him* Lupin: Oh... Snape: Yes, very very very sick. >Luke Cordner laughs at 'giggly pink.' "Okay Stormie!" He tosses in a >chunk of celadine in the cauldron. Snape: Potions is not basketball you little twit! >Kyrie Watts sniffs the wormwood casually, then promptly blanches and sets >it down quickly. "Yuck! Okay, so...do you wanna handle the catnip and the >orris? I'll get the celadine and wormwood set up, and then..well, we >potionafy it!" She moves right ahead with getting the ingredients she >alotted to herself, without really waiting for an answer. "A laughing >potion. Huh. That sounds sort of fun, 'cept for the sick, not breathing >part." Snape: If you don't put your robe back on, Sirius, I shall demonstrate the not breathing part for her. >Zinnia Zeroth nods towards Kyrie and takes the catnip and begins to >prepare it, being sure not to put in too much, after the teacher had >warned of the effects of excess catnip. After that she gets the orris and Lupin: Hopefully the actual cat has left. Sirius, you really should get dressed. >starts to work with it, glancing at her book and watching Kyrie's >proceding with her ingredients as she works. >Stormie Quinn hands Luke the right amount of orris, which she had >meassured carefully. She certainly hoped Luke didn't put in too much >celadine. Sirius: Fine, fine. Snape: I hoped it too, but sadly Luke did. Lupin: And now he's dead. Sirius: *wipes away a tear* >Opening his textbook to the aforementioned page, Giltwist Myrric picks up >his pencil and writes down the ingredients on his notepad. Celandine, >wormwood, orris, and catnip. The boy sets down his writing utensil and >sets about going to work. He rolls up his sleeves and reaches into the >box of supplies for a cauldron. Finding one, as well as the supply of Lupin: He carries his cauldron in a box. Snape: That's efficient. I wonder if the American muggles are as stupid. Sirius: I'll have that drink with a giltwist of lime, please. >water to be used as solvent, he reaches his other hand into the box and >pulls out both objects. Clink. The amber glass and silvery metal come >into contact for a brief moment as they are set upon the table. Giltwist >unscrews the cap on the distilled water and empties about three quarters >of the bottle into the cauldron. When he is satisfied with the amount, he >sets down the bottle of water and recaps it. A quick flick of the ignitor >activates the burner beneath the bowl of the cauldron. Time for the Lupin: Time for the new paragraph. Snape: These ARE muggles! No wonder they're such imbeciles! Sirius: the... burner? >celandine. From the box come two things: a paring knife and piece of the >ingredient that is needed. Using the sharp knife, the yellow blossom is >separated from the stem. Stem is split, and juices are drained into the >cauldron. The petals are delicately shredded and dumped into the pot. So >far so good. Setting down the paring knife, Giltwist nods to himself and Snape: ... goes to bandage the hand that he sliced open while he was shredding petals and still holding the knife. Sirius: ... passes out on the floor due to blood loss. Lupin: ... does the hokey pokey. >rifles through the box for the next ingredient, wormwood. For this, a >rasp is needed, and that, too, is found in the box. Shavings of the wood >are filed into the partially made potion which fizzles momentarily as Snape: What kind of potions class is this?! Lupin: I'm not... Sirius: Just because it's called wood doesn't mean you've got a stick in your hand. Snape: He just used a rasp on a bunch of... Lupin: Perhaps he was still lightheaded from the earlier gash. >each flake touches the surface. The rasp is set aside, and a glass rod is >retrieved from the box to stir the potion. After tapping the rod dry, it, Lupin: I don't know. Tapping a glass rod sounds like a poor idea. >too, is set aside, a dried root of the orris plant is obtained from the >box as well as a morter and pestool. The root is then ground into a fine Snape: What the hell is a morter and pestool? Sirius: It sounds like something to sit on. Lupin: Maybe it's one of those portable chairs. >white powder which smells vaguely of violets. This dust is poured into >the potion. Sensing that the potion is a wee bit too hot, the boy adjusts >the nozzle of the burner slightly. The cermaic dish is set aside, and the Sirius: It seems to be gas powered. Snape: I wonder what the muggle thinks is going to happen. Lupin: Well, it's a happy potion, and wormwood is an ingredient in absinthe. Sirius: And they were talking about getting high earlier. Snape: Ahh... >potion is stirred once more. Finally, the last ingredient is picked up >in a plastic plastic bag from the box. The dried catnip is dumped into Lupin: Not just plastic. Plastic plastic! >the cauldron, and Giltwist returns to stirring the potion as it simmers >gently. He raises his free hand, signaling that he is ready to proceed to >the bottling. Sirius: He has a sign in it. Lupin: Like the the Coyote. Snape: Who? Sirius: Who? >James Crowley sits down at his desk chair, his hands behind his head. HIs >eyes survay the room. He replies, "As soon as you are done >with your potion, just raise it above your head. Don't drink it until I Sirius: Haha! Got you all. I didn't say Simon Says. >give you the go ahead." His eyes fall on Giltwist, "Mr. Myrric, you may >test your potion now." Snape: Yes, yes, test it and -die-! >Luke Cordner takes all the ingrediants and stirs them up in the cauldron. >"Tell me when to stop, Snowy." Lupin: Hmm. 2 lines. 12423 lines. Who should we vote out of the class? Sirius: But he's already going to drink the potion and die. >Stormie Quinn twitches at Luke, "It's Stormie..." watches him stir for a >moment before speaking up. "That's about right, you can stop now.." Snape: I'll bet she's twitching. The fumes must be pretty strong. >Luke Cordner stops doing so and flasks the potion. He holds it above his >head calling out sing-songy, "I'm done!" Sirius: This kid... Lupin: Perhaps this is the Special potions class. >Parker Davies exasperatedly runs into the classroom. He seems to be in a >bit of a tizzy. His hair is unbrushed, his robes are twisted, and he has >dark rings encircling his blue eyes. He immediately jumps up to the >Professor. "Professor..." he's huffing, trying to catch his breath. >"Professor Crowley...I'm sorry that I'm..." He looks at his watch >quickly. He wasn't a little late, he was /really/ late. "...I know I'm >late, sir, I..." he tries to catch his breath again, but instead begins >to wheeze. Snape: 800 points from whatever the hell house you're from! Lupin: Let's make him drink the potion. Sirius: I'm starting to get bored again. Isn't this class ever going to end? >For all that she's a little hyper-active, Kyrie Watts does seem to >be handling the materials themselves with a decent amount of care. Lupin: See? Special. >The girl scrutinizes the half-finished concoction, currently an odd >yellow shade, while adjusting the heat a degree or two. "Just get the >catnip and orris in and I think we're done," she announces to Zinnia >after a moment's thought, nodding. "It'll probably change color, then." Snape: You think? You were just given the recipe not fifteen minutes ago. >Giltwist Myrric reaches into his box to retrieve a glass phial. His free >hand snuffs the flame under the cauldron; and, after being uncorked, the Sirius: It's a bionic hand! Lupin: It's... it's Peter! >phial is placed under the cauldron's tap. The valve is opened, and the >potion is siphoned into the phial. Closing the valve, Giltwist stoppers >the potion and waits for further instruction. Snape: ... a tap?! Lupin, I'm starting to think you were right about this absinthe thing. Snape: Well, drink it you fool. He told you to. >Zinnia Zeroth nods to Kyrie and smiles. She carefully plops the catnip >and orris into the yellow mixture, and watches, hoping it will change >color to a 'giggling pink'. She crosses her fingers, glad to be at the >final point and watching the potion with an eager air. Snape: Plops. Plops?! Sirius: Offending your aesthetic sense, Snape? >James Crowley looks around the classroom, "You can all drink it now. >Remember...only a small sip. Only a small sip." He says one more time for >measure, "/Only/ a small sip." His attention turns to Parker, "Mr. Lupin: He wants there to be enough left for the party in the staff lounge. Snape: Lupin! Those are secret! Sirius: What's this? >Davies, to have joined. You know what they say...better late than never, >I suppose. But you did just miss the whole class. Since this is your >first time, count this as a warning. Next time I report you to your >advisor." He pauses, "Now, to make up this lab...please see me at another >time." Sirius: For some -private- lessons, eh? Snape: A warning?! And he's not even going to report it?! Lupin: Wow. What a patsy. >Luke Cordner giggles as he about to take a sip of the potion...maybe a >gulp. He uncorks it and brings it to his mouth. Snape: Yes, do. Gulp it right down. >Stormie Quinn looks like she is about to scream but clams herself and >places a sand between the vial and Luke's mouth. "Don't you dare...you >are cheery enough as it is." She would hate for him to go into a laughing >fit, in fear of her ear drums bleeding. Lupin: A sand isn't going to make much of an obstruction. Sirius: Now what was this about a party in the staff lounge? Remus? >Parker Davies nods at the Professor, and heaves a sigh, "Yes, >Professor...I will...come by another time..." Sighing, he takes a seat in >a desk, and catches his breath. Snape: It's so hard being insubstantial. Lupin: *whistles innocently* >Kyrie Watts gives the potion a good stir, watching it shift from yellow, >to orange, to a very silly pink color with a growing grin. "Well, it Sirius: Well? Well? Or I throw that silly pink potion at Snape! Snape: Hey! >/looks/ right, I think." She selects a small vial, filling it with no >more than three or four sips of the potion. "Do you wanna take the first >sip, or should I? I dont mind either way. Not really." Though, it's quite >possible she's /more/ than cheerful enough. Lupin: They really -are- high. Snape: It's extremely unwise to do magic while under the influence. >Luke Cordner shrugs and lets Stormie take the potion. It didn't matter to >him. Sirius: Yes, but how does it feel -now-? >Zinnia Zeroth shrugs. "I can, since you seem pretty cheerful already, no >offense." she says, looking at Kyrie's sort of hyper-looking smile, and >energetic talkativity. "Either way is ok with me though." she adds, not >wanting to offend her partner if Kyrie really wanted to drink it. Lupin: What the heck does energetic talkativity look like? Sirius: Snape, you're the one who said he could stopper death. Ever seen an energetic talkativity? Snape: No. And if I ever did, I would kill it. >Stormie Quinn looks down at the potion and takes a tiny sip. At first she >feels nothing, sighing she wonders what they did wrong. Before a minute's Sirius: Poor little frigid student. >pass she began to feel a bit of a tingle, her nose turning a little red >as she quietly begins to giggle to herself. Snape: ... Lupin: Someone should really tell the authorities about this place. >With a faint snicker, Kyrie Watts hands the vial over, thoroughly amused. >"That might be a good idea. Now, r'member," she drops her voice, intoning >severely, "Just a sip. Or you'll end up like me, and we'll have to >duct-tape you to the floor, or something." She takes a quick glance Lupin: Or something. Snape: I can think of several somethings. >around the classroom, then muses, mostly to herself while waiting to see >if it works, "It's a Rudolph potion!" >Zinnia Zeroth chuckles at the comment about duct-taping to the floor, and Sirius: But she hasn't drunk the potion yet! >the Rudolph. She takes a quick sip from the vial, and glances around for >a moment befoer it takes effect. She smiles and her nose turns red as she >turns to Kyrie. "How are you today? I'm just fantidilyastic! This is just >the most fun potions class I've ever been to! And I'm learning a ton!" >she beams, looking around at everyone and smiling. Lupin: I'll just bet you are. Sirius: Now that they're all drunk, it's time for the orgy. Lupin: I don't recall any potions classes at Hogwarts being like this. Snape: And they never will be. >Luke Cordner laughs along with Stormie and the rest of the class. He >didn't drink any potion. Repeat. He didn't drink any potion. Sirius: ... okay? Lupin: *yawn* Snape: We do not care. Repeat. We do not care. >Urgggh. Giltwist Myrric does NOT want to drink the potion. Therefore, he >passes it off to his 'partner' Ruthie. She cheerfully quaffs the potion >and begins screaming and cheering her head off. Oddly, though, she seems >to be cheering about how badly the potion tastes. Sirius: This is your brain on potions. >James Crowley looks at everyone and replies, "Good, it seems you can >follow directions. Now, before you can leave, I want you to bring up the >flasks up here. Don't want you to use this for recreation purposes. Then >you can either wait for the cheering potion to wear off or you can take a >sip of the sadness potion up here." Snape: Except you've just taught them how to make it, you dumbass. Lupin: Exceedingly appropriate for first years. Sirius: What did you learn at school, Skippy? Well, today we made recreational drugs and tested them in class. >Kyrie Watts blinks sharply, then lets out a high-pitched giggle, >somewhere between amused and severely startled. "Thats...that's actually >sort of creepy! Your nose!" A pause, and then she just bursts out >laughing. "None of that for me, I think. Mmmmno. At least it worked." No >longer the most obnoxiously cheerful girl in the class, Ky collects the Snape: Oh, don't be so sure about that. Lupin: Really, no need to be hasty in your judgements. >flask, hopping down and carrying it to the front. "I'm not like that all >the time, though," she assures herself, defensively. >Giltwist Myrric puts away all his leftover supplies into the box and >walks out of the room. Ruthie, who is now cheering about how good her >grades are, carries the flask to the front of the room before leaving. >Stormie Quinn walks up to the desk handing the flask to the teacher, >giggling wildly. "That was really great Professor! We should do this >again sometime!" She laughs, turning and walking smack into the wall. Snape: Smack is right. Sirius: Crack is more like it. Lupin: Don't they have class several times a week? Sirius: Blackouts are never a good sign. >Kyrie Watts passes her potion to the professor, offering him a beam. Lupin: Steel or wood? Snape: It could be a clue-by-four, but I doubt she'd be in possession of one. Sirius: I expect it has something to do with the smacking. >"ThatwasfunandthecheeringpotionsarereallyneatbutIgottafeedmygriffonsoIgottagobye Sirius: I'm sure the griffin will be pleased to see his meal so cheery. >" Seems Miss Watts is trying to talk as fast as possible, so she can >leave as fast as possible, and get away from all the creepy happy people, >who she does not act like /at all/, /ever/. The girl highspeeds back Lupin: The drunkards are creepy, but nothing else was. Right. >towards Zinnia, offers a wave, scoops up her bag, and woosh. She's gone. >Zinnia Zeroth beams at Kyrie. "I could have gotten that willingly, of >course, but thank you for helping." she calls joyfully after her partner. >"I'm fine, thank you, and do not need any sadness potions. Thank was a >just /perfect/ class, though. G'bye, everyone!" she waves. Snape: Because as everyone knows, cheerful and moronic are synonyms. Lupin: Don't forget helpful. >Stormie Quinn looks up and grins widely "Yeeeeeees...I'm just honky >dory!!! Hows abouts you professor? Sirius: Honky? Snape: Hows abouts? Lupin: I'd say it was the potion, but I think she was demented before she drank it. >Luke Cordner falls on the ground and laughs histarical, "Snowy! Wow! >Never seen you like this!" Sirius: And as we all know, he didn't have any at all. Lupin: I wonder how you laugh histarical. Snape: He probably hit his head when he collapsed. >James Crowley calmly, smiling somewhat puts everything away. Another >class done. Now he could go home. Snape: And me?! What about me? What have I done to deserve this? Snape: Shut up. Lupin: I wasn't going to say anything. Sirius: I was. Lupin: I think that's it. Sirius, will Severus fit on the motorcycle with us? Snape: No. Sirius: No. Lupin: Then I think we may all have to watch another one... Sirius: He can sit in my lap. Snape: Deal.